Zoo and Riverboat Cruise - Monday, December 2nd

Aside from the day we met Lily, today was my favorite day in China by far! We started off with breakfast with the Dusseaults. We were hoping to all eat together, but this clearly baffled the hostess. 10 people? At one table? How about 3 tables? Yes, 3 tables will definitely give us the same dining experience as one. We managed to fit at 2 tables - Brian and Beau with Henry, Matthew, and Caroline, and Amanda, Beverly, my mom, me, and Lily at another. I definitely think we had the easier end of that deal, because every time I looked up at least one of the guys was gone from their table getting something for the kids. A few times the kids were there all by themselves. I'm pretty sure I caught one man nearby giving them a strange look, like they had somehow managed to serve themselves food and were just hanging out eating together with no adults in sight. Those crazy Americans...

After breakfast we parted ways with the Dusseaults who had a meeting and then would be heading off to meet James!!! We gathered our things and headed back down to the lobby for a trip to the Guangzhou City Zoo. It was really nice to have another day doing something that the kids enjoyed. We started off our tour of the zoo with rides on these little shuttles that took us all around to see the animals at a glance. We stopped at the panda house to see the two baby pandas, but unfortunately they were hiding inside and we couldn't really see them. Our guides took us down the hill to the giraffes and we got to feed them again! There was one baby, and both Matthew and Caroline were in love and wanted to feed it. This time we got 4 branches for 4 yuan, at the safari park it was 15 yuan for one branch. Smaller zoo, smaller prices! We had fun feeding and watching the giraffes for a bit. Let me tell you, those suckers have some long tongues! If they think there's a chance you'll feed them they start sticking out their tongues like they're going to wrap them around your arm and pull you in. Wearing green might have been a mistake...

Back to the shuttles to finish off the zoo loop, then we had time to explore on our own. This part of the visit will now be titled "Lily vs. Mommy: Lessons on Power Struggles". In just a few short days I have already learned how to distinguish Lily's "I'm scared" cry where she immediately needs to be picked up and snuggled and her "I'm ticked off" cry when she doesn't like something and just wants to throw a fit. I'm sure that in the orphanage this was a main way to get attention, but in our house this will not fly! While it may seem harsh to let her cry a bit and not give in, we are also establishing boundaries for our roles as parents and her role as the child. So, we put her in the stroller with her snack cup in the hopes that she would hang out and give my arms a rest. This lasted about 2.5 seconds. She started crying because she wanted to be held. I stayed in her sight and reassured her, rubbing her back and trying to hold her hand so she knew that I was close and she was safe. Still mad. Then we thought we'd have Brian get her out and "rescue" her to work on establishing that bond. Better, but still mad. She at least let him hold her though, and wasn't doing the "I'm scared" cry, just the "I'm ticked off" cry. He got her to calm down a few times, but she kept starting up again. Another fun thing about all of our sightseeing is that they occur around 11:00, and her naptime was 12:00 at the orphanage. What time is it now, you ask? 11:55. After several minutes of continued crying fits he handed her off to me so that I could try to get her to sleep. I rocked her for a few minutes and she was out. This is when I am oh so sneaky and put the Ergo on. I have free hands and she doesn't know she's restrained! Small break from "Lily vs. Mommy: Lessons on Power Struggles".

I just have to take a minute and brag on Matthew. He has been such an amazing helper and big brother on this trip. His favorite new "big brother" job is to push the stroller for us. He loves it so much, that he doesn't want any help and gets upset if one of us starts to push it. He even goes up all the ramps and says "I can do it by myself. I'm strong." You sure are buddy!

So at this point Matthew is pushing Caroline, Lily's asleep in the Ergo, and all the adults are loving life! We saw a few sleeping bears, some white lions, and lots of ducks and swans swimming around in the pond. We didn't have a ton of time so we asked the kids what was the last section they wanted to see and they chose the reptiles! Matthew showed us how to get there by following all the marked signs and maps. Something interesting (and possibly not humane) about the zoo here is that the animals have hardly any room, and there are lots of them in small areas. The reptiles were all in tiny cages, and many were piled on top of each other. There was one tank of iguanas or lizards of some sort (all the labels are in Chinese so we just made up names for everything. There were lots of lizards and iguanas) and there were so many that it looked like the rock and branches they were on were made of lizards. I mean they were piled on top of each other. I kind of felt like they were staring at me creepily and had to move away. Here's another fun fact about China zoos: they leave live food in the tanks for the animals to eat. So here we are looking at all these lovely reptiles, and Matthew and Caroline are oohing and aahing over the cute little mice, ducklings, and baby bunnies sharing their tanks. Thankfully none of them were in the mood for a meal, or we would have had some fun conversations. Matthew did notice one snake awake and we were trying to move him quickly past it and he starts saying "Is the snake going to eat the ducklings? Why is that gross? I want to see?" No Matthew, he's just going to play with them. Push the stroller over here and look at these cool... lizards? iguanas? chameleons?

Now while we are enjoying these lovely reptile displays, little koala wakes up and realizes she's in the Ergo. Not happy! Resume "Lily vs. Mommy: Lessons on Power Struggles". I know that all she wants is to get out, but she is safe and being held and I can tell she is testing the waters. I hold her close, tell her it's ok, rub her back, and rock her. Still mad. She starts arching her back and attempts to catapult herself out. I hold her closer and tell her no sternly in her ear. She relaxes a bit but is still crying. This cycle continues for what seems like an eternity. Chinese people are giving me strange looks like I am torturing this child and should definitely not be allowed to leave the country with her. It is really hard knowing what to do at this point, because the rules are different with adopted children. But I am relying on my parenting instincts and doing what I think is best at this point. Finally when we have reached the front of the park and our group she stops crying. I praise her like crazy and immediately take her out of the Ergo. She's happy as can be again. Victory! Then we discover stairs. She loves to walk/throw herself down stairs. Unfortunately for her, it's time to go, so we don't have time to go back up the stairs. I carried her away, and when I put her down she turned around and headed right back for them. This happened twice and then I carried her (not too happily) to the bus. She is persistant!

After the zoo our guide took us to a Cantonese restaurant for lunch. It's so nice when he does this because he orders everything for us, and gets things that he knows we will eat. Today we had bbq pork, sweet and sour pork, green beans (delicious!), sweet potato and pumpkin soup (my favorite), goose neck (yikes!), bok choy, rice, tea, and there might have been a few more things but I can't remember what they are.

We came back to the hotel and had some time for naps before our dinner cruise. Today was the first time that Lily took a nap and was not on top of me! I actually got to leave the bedroom once she went to sleep! It was amazing :o) We had to wake all three kids up to go on the boat. They all had bed head and were super sleepy, but perked up when we got there and saw the cool lit-up boats. We had assigned tables in the dining area, and couldn't find ours anywhere! Then we realized that there were people already sitting at it, because it had a great view right next to the window. I don't think so! We showed them our ticket and they moved. We Americans are not as foolish as you may think ;o) We enjoyed sitting next to another family from Florida who just adopted a 10-month-old little girl, and hope to keep in touch with them when we return home. Rumor had it (even from our guide) that the food wasn't that great, so we brought PBJ sandwiches for the kids to eat. I wasn't really hungry at all since we'd had a big lunch so I didn't even go through the buffet. Brian said the highlights were the chicken feet and the whole duck (including the head and bill) on a platter. Delicious! Lily had fun walking around right next to our table and eating her dinner on the go.

After dinner we went up to the top deck. The view and the lights of the city were gorgeous, but I had a little trouble enjoying them because littlest miss wanted to walk around. Not such a good idea when you're unsteady on your feet, are on a moving boat, it's dark, and there are people everywhere looking up at all the lights, not down at their feet where a tiny munchkin might be. Oh, and there were two staircases which must have been screaming "walk down me" loudly in Chinese because that's where Lily kept heading. I took her back down to the dining floor, and once again had to kick someone out of our table. This time I just sat down across from the man without saying anything and he got up and moved.

 Look who's sitting with Daddy!

The last part of the cruise was the entertainment. A Chinese woman dressed sort of like a clown put on a show for the kids that included juggling and balloon animals. To be honest I don't really know what she was doing because I was watching Lily walk around the room and get right up next to the lady to see what she was doing. She is definitely not shy! We are finding out more and more about our daughter every day.

 

When got back to the hotel we got to hear about the Dusseaults' gotcha day, then it was off to bed for the munchkins. Good night from China!

Shopping - Sunday, December 1st

The past few days have really brought out Lily's personality! She is quite adventurous and a total ham. Matthew taught her his favorite trick of hitting himself in the head and then falling down, and now she walks around hitting herself in the head to make people laugh. Thanks Matthew, I could have done without that hilarious joke continuing! She loves to chase Matthew and Caroline around, and give them random objects. There is also apparently no need to buy her any toys, because she entertains herself with empty waterbottles, plastic cups, and snack wrappers. She has also gotten more and more brave and comfortable being away from me. Tonight she even walked across the hall to mom's room and played in there with everyone but me for a while! And I'm not sure because I was kind of already asleep when they came back, but she may have fallen asleep next to me instead of on me. I remember her climbing up to snuggle, but I didn't wake up with a sore back so I don't think she was there very long. She's also making strides with Brian. Today she walked around the gardens holding his hand, she let him change her diaper (score!) and is spending more time with him without me. She still won't let him hold her while she eats her bottle or carry her though. Baby steps!

This morning the breakfast room was crowded so we got upgraded to the 30th floor restaurant. It has a panoramic view of the city and the same delicious food. Everything is just a bit fancier. So up our alley ;) After breakfast we met our group for today's outing - a visit to YueXiu Park and Shangxiajiu walking street and Liwan Plaza for shopping.

The weather today was great. Slightly warmer but still pleasant and sunny. There were lots of stairs in the park, so we left our stroller on the bus and I was forced to put Lily in the Ergo again. She loved it just as much as the last time I put her in it... I think now it's more because she wants to walk around than be carried, so when we got to the top of the stairs to the 5 Goats Statue I let her walk around. She was much happier then, but I missed the entire historical explanation of the statue since I was following her around. I think it's something about goats coming down from the gods or sending something up to the gods? No idea. It's 5 goats made out of stone, that's all I've got.

Then we went back down the steps to an area of the park where everyone was playing hackeysack. When I picture people playing hackeysack I imagine teens or young adults who are kind of in the skater stereotype playing with brightly colored bean bag type balls. Not in China! In China all the people playing were older, retired people (or as they like to call them here, the aged) and they play with these feather things that look kind of like badminton birdie mixed with a lawn dart. I'm sure they got lots of entertainment out of watching all the uncoordinated Americans try to play. I couldn't participate because I couldn't see my feet with Lily in the carrier. (At least that's the lie I told everyone when I missed.) Caroline was again a bit of a movie star, and another group of people asked to take their picture with her. They are usually pretty polite so I tell them that they can try but she might get scared. She usually gives them the stink eye that she has now perfected and hides behind me.

We walked back to the bus and headed to our next destination - shopping! Our guide Simon took us to a pearl shop and a jade shop that he felt were the best quality and lowest price. We started in the pearl shop and I picked out two strands of South Sea pearls to make into 4 bracelets and 4 pairs of earrings. One set for me, and one for Caroline, Lily, and Matthew's future wife on their wedding days. Mom picked out some beautiful pearls for a necklace for herself too. It was so cool watching the lady make the jewelry right there!

Many Chinese wear a jade circle necklace, so we decided to get one for Lily to have on her 16th birthday. Brian had the idea to get 18 different gifts in China, one for each of Lily's birthdays. That way every year she will have something from China. I'm actually wearing the necklace now, because they told us that the green color in the jade spreads when it is worn. I'm pretty sure I won't be wearing this for the next 15 years, but I will wear it while we're in China. The last stop was an embroidery shop where I was able to get a beautiful fan for Lily's room along with some other gifts for friends and family at home. Then back to the hotel.

Picking out Lily's jade

Thank goodness for iphones!

The embroidery shop

Bus buddies!

I knew the Dusseaults were set to arrive in the early afternoon, and I was hoping that we would run into them in the lobby when we got there. Sure enough, we did! They were just checking in! Matthew and Caroline were so happy to see Henry. After saying our hellos and greetings we went upstairs and let the kids run around the hallway for a bit. Their room is right down the hall from us! Our kids hadn't eaten so we let the Dusseaults get settled and fed our kids some PBJ. Then we took them down to see the fish. Matthew and Caroline have been talking about showing Henry the fish for several days now. They had a great time running all around the gardens. Caroline was starting to get tired, and Matthew had been pretty cranky all day so we said bye to the Dusseaults and headed up for naps. M and C went to sleep in Baba's room and we had to wake them up at 7:00 for dinner! I guess they were pretty tired! Brian and I had fun playing with Lily in our room and I did a little more laundry. Around 5:00 little koala started getting sleepy so we took a short nap together. We decided to have a low key night and Brian went and grabbed a pizza for dinner. Then we let the kids watch a movie and relax and play. Tomorrow we get to go to another zoo and on a dinner cruise on the Pearl River!

Safari Park - Saturday, November 30th

We had another free day today until a 2:30 meetings so we decided to be adventurous and get out of here! I had heard the Safari Park is pretty cool and thought that was something the kids would appreciate. When I told them where we were going Caroline was ecstatic and kept shouting "we're going to see animals!" I'm telling you this girl is going to work with animals when she grows up. She loves them! So after breakfast we did a really quick fish loop (it's pretty much a requirement now) and gathered our things for the day.

Since we didn't have a ton of time we decided to take a taxi instead of navigating the subway. Matthew was so excited and told us that this was his first time in a taxi! And to make things even more amazing, it was an aqua taxi, his favorite color. So all 6 of us fit in one small cab. Remember what I said about no seatbelts? Apparently they don't have maximum occupancy rules either. 2 adults and 3 kids in the backseat! It took us about 25 minutes to get there, and we got to see even more of the city on our drive. I cannot get over how huge it is! I mean we drove for 25 minutes and there were still skyscrapers everywhere you look. Guangzhou is only the eighth largest city in China, and it makes New York look tiny! I discovered that Lily did not want to sit in my lap very long. Not looking forward to that 13 hour plane flight coming up... but at least it's at night so hopefully she will sleep most of it!

We got there and grabbed some maps, and Caroline immediately opened hers up and yelled "They have pandas! They have pandas!" We tried to find the pandas first, but we ended up walking through like 20 types of primates instead. Finally we found some white tigers. Brian paid 10RMB (about $1.50) to throw some raw meat at them. Like huge hunks of chicken or some other unidentified meat. Definitely wouldn't see that in the states! Matthew and Caroline both love giraffes, and we were able to feed them too! They all line up at the edge of the exhibit and people just constantly hold out branches for them to eat.

I realize this carry is not ergo-approved, but it's the only way she's happy!

 

We also saw some koalas, but our little koala girl slept through them. She did wake up for lunch at the koala café though! There was a crazy long line for food, so we opted to just go through the snack line and get hotdogs and fries for the kids. Then we let them pick out an ice cream after. We are just the picture of healthy eating :)

After lunch we finally found the pandas! Either the pandas are by far the most popular exhibit, or several bus loads of people arrived after lunch. It was packed! You could hardly see the pandas there were so many people. Surprisingly, this was the first time I actually felt like I was in China. I guess I expected it to be ridiculously crowded all the time.

Once we had seen the pandas we had to head back to the hotel for our paperwork meeting. Mom bought each of the kids a little keychain animal, pandas for M and C and a koala for L. These proved invaluable as entertainment for little bit on the way back. We grabbed a taxi, and were forced to pay 150RMB to get back to the hotel instead of the 80RMB we paid on the way out. But, we were short on time and didn't have a choice. We felt a little victorious though because the first guy we asked was rude and we walked away, and another guy picked us up around the corner. He was much nicer. We quickly discovered why the fare was so much more on the way back. The traffic was awful! Instead of taking 25 minutes it took almost an hour, which made Brian 25 minutes late for the meeting. And he missed the laundry pickup :( Guess I'll be wearing my food-covered jeans a few more times...

Caroline fell asleep in the taxi so we put her right to bed. Then Matthew and Lily got some good play time in our room until Lily started getting sleepy again. I let Matthew play with my phone while she napped, and M and I got some snuggle time in the bed. Brian got back from his meeting and we decided that we would venture out again to try and buy a stroller. We didn't bring one because you can borrow one from the hotel, but every single time we've asked they've been out. We have several days of sightseeing ahead, and since Lily doesn't really like the Ergo we are going to need a backup plan. When C finally got up we headed out. I had heard there was a cheap umbrella stroller on the 4th floor of Aeon, and I wasn't disappointed! A pink snoopy stroller that was on sale for $25! Sold! I anxiously held my breath as I put Lily in it, praying that she would like it. Victory! As long as I was moving she was fine! My tired shoulders and back are so excited.

At this point the kids were hungry so we found a little coffee shop that had sandwiches and pasta. And the man working there spoke English! It was so nice to order food and know what we were getting! And one more perk - they gave us knives, and napkins!!! Who knew these would be such a delicacy in China. Why they don't use napkins I have no idea. Are they really that much neater when they eat? And knives... I mean, I know they use chopsticks, but you can't cut with chopsticks! And when you have a baby with a cleft palate, you have to cut stuff. We were those crazy hoarders who stuck all the remaining plastic silverware in our bags to take home and reuse.

Back home for playtime and bed. We are going to a local park and doing some shopping tomorrow. Yippee!

Orphanage Visit - Friday, November 29th

We decided not to take Lily back to her orphanage today, but we did want to be able to see it, talk to her nannies, and take pictures for her so Brian went alone. That left Mom and I with the three kids. The first time the adults were outnumbered! Since we had been going places every day since we got here, I thought it would be nice to have a laid back day around the hotel and let the kids get some good bonding time in. We started with breakfast. Normally Brian starts getting the kids food while we get everyone situated, but since he wasn't there mom went and got food. Once we got the kids eating, I left to get my breakfast. Of course Lily chooses this moment to shove a large piece of food in her mouth and start choking, and when my mom scooped it out of her mouth she started screaming since someone had taken her food. She never fully recovered, and was pretty fussy all through breakfast. Next we hit up the fish ponds and gardens. Lily hadn't seen them yet and Matthew and Caroline were really excited to show them to her. We spent some time walking around, and Lily spent some time attempting to walk directly off the ledge into the fish pond. This girl is going to be a handful!

When I got tired of rescuing Ms. Daredevil from a watery adventure we went back up to the room. The kids had fun playing together, getting Lily to laugh and walk around the room. We also discovered that she really likes pulling plugs out of the wall. Did I mention that she's going to be a handful? We were overdue on the kids' baths, so we decided to clean them up. Lily didn't really like the bath last time, but this time she loved it! I gave her some stacking cups and she had a great time banging them together and splashing. She didn't even mind getting her hair wet, which is more than I can say about the other two munchkins.

Then it was more playtime, and we were able to Skype with the Dusseaults who will be joining us in China on Sunday!!!! We opted to stay in for lunch and go out for dinner later when Brian got back. The kids were getting cranky so it quickly became nap time! Lily goes to sleep really quickly when I'm holding and rocking her, but I still can't manage to lay her down and leave the room once she's asleep. The second I put her down she wakes up and cries. I think this is the hardest part - I don't have a single second away all day long because when she's sleeping, it's on me! I know that once she feels more secure and knows her environment is stable this will change, but right now it's tough.

Brian got home from the orphanage around 3:00 while everyone was sleeping. He was able to talk with the orphanage director who said that they all love "Tang Tang" and miss her. He also met her main nanny and got pictures with her. She taught Lily lots of things, including how to walk. While the orphanage was in a newer and much nicer facility, he was still able to get an idea of how things were at her old orphanage. All the kids sleep in metal cribs, placed end to end with about 20 in a room. They spend most of their time in one large playroom. The kids under about age 3 are all together all the time, so Lily, James, and Elijah spent all day every day together. It will be interesting to see if Lily recognizes James when she sees him at the hotel in a few days! When Brian got there the kids were having lunch, which was basically just a bowl of porridge or congee. No wonder Lily loves to eat, she hasn't ever tasted so many flavors! Brian also got to see James and get a picture with him to send to Beau and Amanda.

After the orphanage visit he was supposed to go to Lily's finding spot, but the driver wasn't able to find it (haha!) They did go by the old orphanage and get some pictures of the outside, but he wasn't able to go in. While the nannies did seem to really care for the children and babies, it was still a pretty bleak and undesirable place to spend a childhood. We are so thankful Lily has a family now!

 This picture was on the wall of the orphanage - baby Lily!

The playroom

 Lily's crib

Lily's main nanny

Alright, so here's the exciting news for the day. Once all the kids were up from their naps, they were all playing in the living room together with Brian and I WENT IN THE BEDROOM AND TOOK A NAP AND LILY DIDN'T CRY FOR ME!!!!!!!!! It was amazing. But it was nearly impossible for me to get up and go to dinner. Finally they made me, and we decided to try a Thai restaurant. Because it had taken me so long to get up, it was after 6:00 when we left. This is already sounding a lot like a parenting fail... We got there, and it was a rather nice sit down place with live music circulating around the room. Step 2 of the parenting fail. Oh, and it was laundry day so I was wearing my half-marathon shirt and jeans with my hair in a ponytail. Not quite the dress of everyone else there. Those crazy Americans again! They seated us and Lily lasted about 5 minutes before she started to cry. She had drank all the water from her sippy cup, and I didn't have any snacks since I thought we'd be eating right away. Parenting fail part 3. I spent the next 15-20 minutes trying to entertain Lily in the hallway leading to the bathroom. It was only partially successful. I don't know if it's because we're Americans or if this is just how the Chinese do things, but every time we need to order food we have to hunt down someone. At least this time no one said no when we tried to order! While we were waiting on our food to come, Matthew fell asleep in Baba's arms. We couldn't wake him up, so we laid him down on 2 chairs and let him sleep. When the food arrived, Lily was finally happy since she could eat! Unfortunately this didn't last long because it was getting closer and closer to her bedtime and we didn't bring her bottle (and now the parenting fail has come full circle). Caroline was the only kid who was enjoying herself! She was dancing to the music, eating her food, and loving sitting on Daddy's lap. I was pretty much done at this point, so mom and I took Caroline and Lily back to the hotel and Brian stayed behind to get take out boxes and pay and carry home a sleeping buddy.

 

We've been trying to have Brian feed Lily her bottle and give her snacks and food to increase their bond, but she was having nothing to do with that when he got back! She fell asleep while I was feeding her, and I thought "Sweet! Only my arm is stuck, I'll actually be able to have some time to myself or to spend with Brian before I go to bed!" Yeah, not so much. As soon as I moved she woke up and cried and was laying on top of me again. Let me tell you, this adoption stuff is not easy! Tonight I had my first meltdown and felt much better after. I don't think I've cried since we got here, so I obviously needed to get it out. I think the hardest thing is not feeling like I can spend time with Matthew and Caroline, and they both started to feel it today when Daddy was gone. They were needy, Lily was needy, and I was exhausted! Baby steps, baby steps.